I’m all for the right to choose work & family, focusing on family, or, being single, AND for social safety net to ensure single parents and their children can survive decently so children can thrive.
Gen-X-er here raised by a stay-at-home mom for most of my childhood.
Even as a child, I saw that it was hard for my mom. Four children, one car, father who went out with co-workers while she had no outside space where she could be her own person.
Everyone knows marriages have their ups and downs, but when you’re an isolated, stay-at-home mom while your marriage is on a downward trajectory, it can be awful. No one talks about the head games, anxiety, depression women experience and are expected to keep going, rain or shine without vacation, sick days, or support.
I had school friends who had stay-at-home moms and a couple with abusive fathers. The father’s were often angry, blamed their wife for whatever they could think of. They were never satisfied, even though they had someone to cook, clean, take care of children, etc. It was terrifying to see that and really made an impression on me.
Men like them think the country became messed up because women became independent and went to work. They only blame others and never see how they contributed towards the problems.
My brother, who is very conservative, conveniently forgot seeing these same things, likely because he knew he himself would never get stuck in that situation and so he never bothered to imagine it or empathize.
Women’s independence became a necessity after existing in a world where we lacked rights, or freedom to gain higher education, or ability support ourselves and our family.
Men don’t want to understand this or at least consider that their children are more likely to survive in a society where woman can survive without a man. They fail to realize that in the event of their loss as the only means of a woman’s (and their children’s) survival, that women NOT being able to earn a living safely OR get support as a single mother means their children can starve and are more likely to be vulnerable to harm.
Instead, they elect people who choose to make it harder for single mothers by allowing day care to be unaffordable and social assistance to be difficult and of poor quality.
More power to them if young women choose, for themselves, to pursue some fantasy of being domestic goddesses, but that's not what this is about, it's about giving up power. If they stupidly want to do that & think men will magically honor social contracts, that's on them, there is no way in hell that stupidity can dictate others lives.
There is a legitimate desire for the traditional role of a mother staying home with the children while the father works. I was raised in such a household. I was born in the 50ies. My father honored my mother. She wasn’t “second place” in his eyes. He made sure that she got her own bank account and credit cards when women could legally get them in their own names. He wanted her to have her own accounts in case he was in a fatal car accident or something. It takes time to sort out the legalities and she had to have money for to maintain the house.
But that was back when America had a large middle class. Back when millionaires paid MUCH higher taxes - pre “trickle down economics” plan that decimated America’s middle class.
Now it is the few LUCKY families that can survive on one income!!
A home and 2 cars in the garage - food, energy and healthcare on one income is out of reach for most young Americans.
Women who want this option should demand the economic policies work to make this lifestyle available again - not just for the wealthy, but for the majority of America women.
I’m all for the right to choose work & family, focusing on family, or, being single, AND for social safety net to ensure single parents and their children can survive decently so children can thrive.
Gen-X-er here raised by a stay-at-home mom for most of my childhood.
Even as a child, I saw that it was hard for my mom. Four children, one car, father who went out with co-workers while she had no outside space where she could be her own person.
Everyone knows marriages have their ups and downs, but when you’re an isolated, stay-at-home mom while your marriage is on a downward trajectory, it can be awful. No one talks about the head games, anxiety, depression women experience and are expected to keep going, rain or shine without vacation, sick days, or support.
I had school friends who had stay-at-home moms and a couple with abusive fathers. The father’s were often angry, blamed their wife for whatever they could think of. They were never satisfied, even though they had someone to cook, clean, take care of children, etc. It was terrifying to see that and really made an impression on me.
Men like them think the country became messed up because women became independent and went to work. They only blame others and never see how they contributed towards the problems.
My brother, who is very conservative, conveniently forgot seeing these same things, likely because he knew he himself would never get stuck in that situation and so he never bothered to imagine it or empathize.
Women’s independence became a necessity after existing in a world where we lacked rights, or freedom to gain higher education, or ability support ourselves and our family.
Men don’t want to understand this or at least consider that their children are more likely to survive in a society where woman can survive without a man. They fail to realize that in the event of their loss as the only means of a woman’s (and their children’s) survival, that women NOT being able to earn a living safely OR get support as a single mother means their children can starve and are more likely to be vulnerable to harm.
Instead, they elect people who choose to make it harder for single mothers by allowing day care to be unaffordable and social assistance to be difficult and of poor quality.
Wow!!!!! This has to be turned around!!!
More power to them if young women choose, for themselves, to pursue some fantasy of being domestic goddesses, but that's not what this is about, it's about giving up power. If they stupidly want to do that & think men will magically honor social contracts, that's on them, there is no way in hell that stupidity can dictate others lives.
There is a legitimate desire for the traditional role of a mother staying home with the children while the father works. I was raised in such a household. I was born in the 50ies. My father honored my mother. She wasn’t “second place” in his eyes. He made sure that she got her own bank account and credit cards when women could legally get them in their own names. He wanted her to have her own accounts in case he was in a fatal car accident or something. It takes time to sort out the legalities and she had to have money for to maintain the house.
But that was back when America had a large middle class. Back when millionaires paid MUCH higher taxes - pre “trickle down economics” plan that decimated America’s middle class.
Now it is the few LUCKY families that can survive on one income!!
A home and 2 cars in the garage - food, energy and healthcare on one income is out of reach for most young Americans.
Women who want this option should demand the economic policies work to make this lifestyle available again - not just for the wealthy, but for the majority of America women.
America needs a Middle Class again.
A return of Middle Class, but with family styles however people choose.
Oh yes!! And no second class of women’s rights.
What bothers me is selling women this one income dream when the Republicans economic policies don’t allow for it.
Agree 100%